sometimes life is not fair...whoever agreed with me raised your hand!

hmmm,,,

where do i have to begin??

ok,,,

today i met Manohara in Plasa Semanggi (a.ka Plangi)....

she is beautiful, charming, tall, smart (maybe), rich, has beautiful hair, singkat kata dia flawless..

and she's only 17 or maybe 18~!!!!!!!!

she's younger than me!!!!!!!!!

and yess!!!yess!!!!!!!! i envy her!!!

before that i saw a magazine,,,and on the cover theres kimmy,,kimmy jayanti,,,,

she's the most beautiful dark skinned girl i have ever seen,,she's edgy,,she'sBEAUTIFUL on that magazine cover!!!!!

and yesssss!!! she's younger than me!!!

and as i pass the book store by i saw me,,,,in the mirror...

22 years old,,fat,,short,,ugly,,unemployed,,not talented girl,,

singkat kata pathetic...

gw pikir gw bisa lupain ajah pikiran gw pas gw ngeliat ke kaca,,,

and as i go by,,,,ternyata gw msih mikirin hal itu,,,sampe gw kesel bgt dan gw menghela nafas panjang dan "agak sedikit berteriak": "haaahh!!!!!!" di depan sport station sampe kedua teman gw yaitu, maria dan uli shock dan pasang muka bingung,,,tampa mereka harus ngomong jgua gw bisa nebak apa yang ada di dalem kepala mereka...pasti mereka mikir ginih: "lo kenape dy?!?! tiba2 tereak gituh?!?!"

dan tiba2 mereka ngomong apa yang ada di pikiran mereka ituh....

dan gw jawab: " hidup itu ga adil!!bner2 ga adil!! tadi barusan kita liat kimmy as a model for a magazine cover!! she's only 17 or 18...an yet she's already earn her own money, modelling as her job ( which I think fun), she's beautiful, and me!!! look at me!!! gw umur 22 taon, ga bisa apa2, ga ber-talenta apa2, belon lulus, belom kerja dan ga bisa menghasilkan apa2!!!!

lalu uli berkata " HEH!!!!! bukan cuman lo doank yah yang kaya' mikir kaya' gitu!! gw juga!!

mereka pergi pagi pulang malem ada hasilnya,,lah kita!!!!!! pergi pagi pulang malem malah ngabisin duit!! bukan ngehasilin duit kaya' mereka!!!!"

and then next we saw manoharce!!!!!

tambah marah lagi lah kita!ghghaghaghaghaghaghaghagahgahgahaaaa

and i think,,,hey...life is not fair,,,

kenapa yah orang2 sehebat itu,,,dan ketika melihat ke diri ndiri kita bilang kowq gw ginih yah???

kenapa gw ga bisa kaya' mereka yah???ato mungkin marah dan tereak kaya' yang gw lakuin tadi..

tp pas ge udah nyampe kost,,gw berpikir,,kenapa seyh gw ga bersyukur bgt dengan apa yang uah gw dapet,,,

walaupun gw pendek,,gendut,,jelek,,belom lulus,, belom berpenghasilan,,

tp gw nyaman dengan apa yg gw dapet di dunia,, gw ga punya beban moral harus jaga nama besar gw didepan banyak orang banyak yang kenal gw,,, ato dalam konteks mereka se-Indonesia!! i don't have that responsibility,,,

i have a fun & loving family that loves me whoever i am,,and whatever i want (but of course in a positive way),, i have many friends that i love so much and maybe they love me so much!!!!!!!

and i'm comfortable being with them!!

singkat kata "I LOVE MY LIFE!! I LOVE THE FAT ME!!! I LOVE ME,, I LOVE MYSELF!!!!"

gw udah dikasih Tuhan tubuh yang sehat,,ga disilet2,,ga digebukin sama suami,, walaupun gendut gw ga da penyakit yg bikin gw harus ke rumah sakit (amit-amit *knock on the wood*)

kenapa seyh gw GA BERSYUKUR?????

sambil gw ngetik post ini gw akhirnya nyadar..

i don't care being rich or beautful or pretty or skinny or tall,,,

i love me the way i am!! thank God!!!! :D

temanku adys....

jadi geneeehhh~
dengerin tante mao cerita...

pas waktu rUa GASUH kmaren,,pas selese makan siang,,
adys ngomong ke gw,,,

adys: " dy,,,mas-mas maintenance-nyah mao kita kasih nasi bungkus ga??"
heidy: " yaudah,,kasih ajah,,masih ada sisa khaan,,,kasih ajah."
adys: " oohh,,ok,,ok,, berapa yah?? tiga bungkus cukup ga yah?!?"
heidy: " mas-masnya ada berapa biji?? banyak ga??"
adys: " ga tau,,,"
heidy: " yaudah bawa ajah lima bungkus doloo,,nnti klo kita masih ada lebihan kita kasih mereka lagih..gmn??" (gw bertanya kembali kepada makhluk yang terkesan sangar itu)..
adys: "yaudah,,yuuuk"

yaudah laahhh,,,,,dengan membawa 5 bungkus nasi-ayam penyet yg sangat terkenal mak-nyuuusss-nya dan terkenal se-antero lobiers,, kita naek ke YB 1...tempat maintenance ituh,,,,,,,dengan menggunakan LIFT...
trus gw bilang ke adys....
gw: "dys,,,kowq pake lift seyh??manja bgt!!! atu lantai ajah juga!!!naek tangga ajah!!"
adys: " kaga!!kaga!!!,,,biar lama bego,,,gw males turun cepet2 ke bawah!!"
gw: ( karena gw pikir ide-nya adys oke jg,,,,dan gw hanyalah manusia biasa yg terbujuk rayuan saiton jdnya gw.......) "oohhhh,,,bner juga,,yaudahh,,,"

naiklah kita ke yB 1 dengan menggunakan LIFT.....sesampainya d yB 1,kita masuk tuh ke ruang maintenance ituh,,soalnya kita pikir,,banyak mas-mas dan mba-mba yg menjadi "kuncen" ruangan kelas d YB itu berkumpul..

eeeeeeehhh,,,,,,ndelalaahhh~
di ruangan itu kosong...
yaudah kita (2 makhluk gahar ini) keluar lagih....karena setelah kita ber-assalamualaikum-ria ternyata tidak ada jawaban,,,

pas kita keluar,,,ternyata ada mas-mas maintenance lagi nyempil d deket tangga darurat itu ,,,yg ada lemari coklat kecil itu,,yg dibelakang papan pengumuman,,
dy bilang....

mas-mas maintenance: "mba!! nape??? nyariin sape???"
2 makhluk yg terkenal galak (heidy+adys): " ga mas...itu d ruang maintenance itu ga da orang yah??"
mas-mas maintenance: "ga da,,lagi pada kluar kali mba,,,lagi pada ke atas,,emangnya napa mba??"
2 makhluk yg terkenal galak: "kaga,,ini lhhoohhh,,,,mao ngasih nasi bungkus,,,,orangnya ada berapa mas?? banyak ga?"
mas-mas maintenance:" hmmmm......(dy ngedumel tanda sedang berhitung),,,,sekitar 5 sampe 7 orang-an lah."
2 makhluk yg terkenal galak: " ooooo....ini adanya segini doloo yah mas....nanti klo ada lebihan lagih kita kasih ke atas yah......"
(sambil kita menyodorkan bungkusan demi bungkusan di tangan kita.....dan menaruhnya d atas meja mas-mas maintenance ituh)

laluuuuu~ adys berjalan lah ke arah LIFT YB 1.........trus dy nge-longok ke dalem ruangan yg ada d sebelah lift YB 1.....

ruangan itu gelap gulita....tidak ada apa2....
krn gw ngerasain yg "suasana yg ga enak" jd gw berkata......

gw: " ~adyssssssss~ " (dengan nada yg sangat rendah,,,,dan suara yg pelan,,sama sekali tidak terkesan mengintimidasi ato menakut-nakuti,,ato seperti yg biasa gw dan adys lakukan....TEREAK2....kaga....ini gw ngomong dengan penuh ketulusan dr hati yg paling dalam,,,

bersamaan dengan gw ngomong....tiba-tiba adys.....

adys: "HHHHUUUUUUUUWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(TEREAAAKKK KUUEENNCEENGGGG BGTTT,, TRUS NGIBRIT KETAKUTAN!!LARI CEPET BGT!!KE ARAH TANGGA)

kan gw kaget juga yakk!!!gw pikir dy liat apaan di dalem gtuh....gw juga ngibritngikutin adys sambil tereak kuenceng bgt!!

adys: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!
ANJRRROOOOOOOTTTT........ANJRIIIIITTTTTTT......!!!!!"
gw: " huahahahahahahgahghaghaghaghagahgahgahgahgahghagahghagahghagahgahghaghaaa~~
aggagahgahgahghahaghaghaghaghaghaghaghagha~~
haghgahgahaghaghaghaghaghaghaghghaghaghagahghagahgahghagahgahgahgahgahgaa~~ahgahgahgahgaa
ghaghgahgahgahgahgahghagahgaha~~
(ga bisa nahan ketawa karena melihat muka adys yg sangat ketakutan.....padahal gw kira adys itu tidak takut apa2...dan tersihir dgn eyeliner yg bikin matanya makin serem..)

gw: "haghaghaghaghgaaaa~ ANJRITTT lo nape lo~ gahgahgahgahghaghaghaghghaghgahaghaghaghaaa~~
hgahaghaghgahgahgaa~ liat ape lo di dalem?!?!? ghaghagaghahaghaghaghaghgaa"

adys: "hgagahgahghahaghaghagahgahghaghagahgahgahghagahgahgahghaghagahgaaa~~
ANJRRRIIIITTTTTTT~!!!!!!!!!AGAHGAHGAHGAHGHGAGHAGAHGAHGHAGHAGHAGHAGHAGAGA
GAGHAGHAGHAGHAGHAGHAGHAGHAGAAG
hgahahghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghghagaghg~ ANJRITTTTT~"

gw:"apaan babi!!!!!ksih tau!!!!aghaghgahgahgahgahgahgahgahghagahghaghagaghaggaga
haghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghagahghgahgahgahgahgahghaa~
(bayangkan conversation yg terjalin diantara kedua orang bodoh ini......ngobrol sambil ketawa sampe nangis)

mas-mas maintenance: " ADA APA MBA?!?!!? ADA APA!!!?!?!?
KENAPA?!!!?!?!" (nanya dgn muka khawatir)
kita berdua: " gahgahgahgahgahgahghagahghagahgahgahgahgahgagahgahgahgahaaa!!!~~
kga nape2 mas~~hhahjahahjhajhajhajhajhajhajhaghgahgahgahgagiafihgajnvavfgouawehrgvaejv abdcewfoqwegfvdbcaKLHVsdfuwegf89vahaa~
kaga nape2....(sambil berjalan turun kebawah.....)

gw: " heh setan!!!!! lo bilang ga ke gw lo liat apa?!!?!??lo kaget yah gw panggil nama lo!?!?!? bilang petan!!!!~haghaghaghgahgaahgahgahgahgagahgahgahgahgagahaghHGHGAHGAHGAHhghaghaghagGAHGAHGAHGAHGA
HAGHGAHGAHGAHAHGHgahgahgahgahgahgaaa~"

adys: " haghaggahagaghaghaghgagahgahgahgaaa~
iyah nyetttt~!!! gw kaget~!!!! trus gw liat d dalem ruangan itu.....yg buat nge-pel lante.....tp dibalikin ke atas kaennya.......jd gw kira itu rambut!!!!pas gw liat itu,,,barengan pula khan sama lo manggil nama gw!!!!hgahaghaghaghaghaghghgahgahgahgahgahgahgahgahgaaa~gahgahghaga~~
khan gw jadi kaget monyeddddd!!!!!!! gw kira paan tuh !!!!!!!gahgahgahgahgahgahgahghaga
gaghaghaghaghaghaghagahgahgahgahgahgahgahgahga~~

gw: " babbbiiiiikkkkk~hgaahghagahghaghagahgahgahgahgahghaghaghghaghaghaghagha~hgahgahgaha
gw kirain paan kuyaa!!!! hghgahgahgahghaghaghaghaghagahgHGHGAHGAHGAHGAHghagah
haghaghagaghaghaghagha
ghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghagaghagahg~

(tertawa terbahak2 sampe d ruang rUa.....)

gw: " gw pikir lo gahar....serem....tp,,,,,gahgahgahghghaghagahghagahgahghagahghaghaaaaaaa~"
adys: " gw,,gw,,,gw,,,,,kalo sama setan mah gw ampun dahhhh~~~agahgahghagahgahaa
gw ga mao dah yg begituan!!!!ampunnnnn!!!!!"
gw: "ghhaghaghaghaghaghagHGHAGHAGHAGHAGAHGAHGAHGAHGAHGhghagahgahgahgahgahgha
ghaghaghaghagahgHGAHGAHGAHGAHGAHGgagahgahgahgahgaHGAHGAHGAHGHAGAHGAHGAHGHAG
GAHGAHGAHAHGAHGAHGAHGAHGAGAHAA~~BEGO LO DYS!!!!!~~"



Dsaat itu lah gw nyadar ternyata,,,adys hanyalah manusia biasa,,,,,yg bisa ketakutan jg....

aghagahgahghaghaghaghaghaghaghagaggahgahgahgahgahgaa~

sebelum2nya gw ga tau tuh!!!!!sampe pas kmaren rUa GASUH~~
gahgagahgahgahgahgahgahgahaa

jd jgn takut ma adys....jg takut di jedotin palanya ke meja.....jgn takut di jambak rambutnya ma dy,,,jgn takut di tereakin ma dy,,,,jgn takut di-pilin2 ma dy,,,,jgn takut di peres tangan lo ma dy....

karena deep down....adys hanyalah manusia biasa,,,,,seperti kita....




~THIS NOTE DEDICATED TO..................................ADYS!!!!!!~
men!!!!bego lo dysss!!!!!!tolol abissss!!!!coba pas itu gw bisa video-in mukenye adys....pasti lo pade bakalan ketawa terpingkal2 ampe kencing d celana!!!

ahaghaghaghghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghaghagahagahghaghaghagahgahgahgagahgahgahgahgagahgahggag
ahgahgahghaghghaghagagahgahgahghghaghaga


PISS ~~~ \m/ ROCK ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! COWABUNGGA!!!!!!!!!!!! \m/

This is where i belong..

I went to Bali last November..

that beautiful island with all the positives and negatives that i love..gaghaghghghagaa

i always love that island..that's what i always say to all my friends...

i always wanna live in Bali someday,,,because i think this island is amazing,,,

with the culture,,the foods,,the friendly people,,the view,,and this is what i love the most about Bali...the beaches!!

even after the bombing,,the beaches doesn't change,, they are still beautiful

i know i'm unlike those surfers who came to Bali to enjoy the waves..(and i envy them becos of that,,'cos i can't surf,,,and i can't swim!! errrgggghh!!)

i just enjoy Bali by it's view...but thats enough to make wanna stay in Bali for the rest of my life..

gahaghaghgghaghaghaghagaaaaa..

especially after i saw the most beautiful sunset on earth!!

i know,,,i might be exaggerate this...but if u were there and saw that sunset~

u'll be amazed...

i know i have seen many sunsets and sunrises in my life and i saw most of them in Bali,,,

but i never get bored to see it and i just want to see more and more of it!

i saw the most beautiful sunset the last time i went to bali and that sunset made everyone smiled and felt hopeful again...

and at that exact time i thought,,this is where i belong,,

i don't care about the tsunami, i don't care about global warming and the rise of the sea level and will drowned Bali,,i don't care if there will be another bombing in Bali (i hope not)..

i just wanna live here!

seriously~i just wanna live in Bali~

i can live just to see this kind of view...seriously,,,that sunset,,take my heart away~

agagahgahgahgahgahaghgagaaa....

till next time Bali.... hahahhahahahahaahahaaaa

since i don't have diary..

hgahaghaghaghaghaghaghagahgaaaaa...

judul ini sepertinya terlalu desperate untuk mulai membuat blog ga sih????

ahghagahgahgaaa...

tapi ini bener bgt lho...gw tuh ga pernah punya diary,,,well...bukannya ga pernah punya sama sekali,,

setiap anak cewe psti gw pikir punya diary buat curhat-curhat-an sama sesuatu yg bisa dipercaya dan ga "lemez",,,hghaghaghghaghgaaa

like boys stuff,,love life,,and so on,,and so on,,,

sesuatu yg kita ga bisa cerita di saat "ABG"..saat kaya'nya di saat itu orang tua tuh ga bisa ngertiin kita banget ya ga seyh??

dulu gw punya diary,

diary gw warnanya merah,,ada gambar mickey and minnie mouse,,ada kuncinya gitu,,kunci kecil yang sebenernya ga da gunanya gitu~hahahahaahahahahahahahaaaa

diary itu gw simpen di tempat yang sangat aman sampe2 gw sendiri pun susah buat nyarinya kadang2..yaitu di lemari baju gw yang sangat berantakan..

gw pikir "lemari baju" adalah tempat yang sangat tepat untuk menyimpan "buku keramat" itu,

karena gw ajah males nyentuh tu lemari apa lagi orang laen...hahaahahahahahaa..embarrassing!!

gw ceritain apa2 ajah yg gw alamin di setiap hari2 gw ke si diary itu,

mulai dari keseharian gw di sekolah,guru2 yg bikin bete,,dipanggil guru BP gara2 nimpuk kepala-nya pake sepatu tmen gw,, dipanggil BP lagi gara2 berantem yang menyebabkan 2 angkatan berantem besar (kaya suporter persija yang ga terima kalah tanding),,dipanggil BP lagi gara2 bikin wali kelas gw nangis dan ngambek sampe ga mao ngajar,,

hal2 sepele yang bisa bikin ketawa2 sampe hal2 yang bikin gw sedih pun gw tulis di diary itu..

sampe kalo sekarang gw pikir2 koq gw kampungan bgt sih nulis hal2 ga penting gitu di "buku berkunci gembok ga penting itu"??!?!?!!?!?

di saat itu gw masih polos dan lugu untuk mempercayai etika bahwa "tidak ada orang yang bakal membaca buku diary gw" karena itu isinya privacy gw dan orang2 menghormati itu,,,

sampaaaaaaiiii,,,,,

JENG,,JENGGGGGG!!!!!!

emak gw tercinta menemukan "si buku keramat yang gw simpen di lemari gw yang kaya kandang babi" ituuuuuuuu!!!

lalu dy bacalah sampe ketawa2 ngakak dan memberitahukan seluruh isi diary gw ke bokap..dan keluarga besar gw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

bayanginnnnnnn,,,malunyaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!

sejak itu gw ga mao nyoba2 untuk punya diary lagi,,sampe kelas 3 SMA disaat lagi labil2nya gw memutuskan untuk punya diary lagi~~

dan ternyataaaaa!!! emak gw tercinta menemukan lagi tempat persembunyian si diary centil gw....(soalnya warnya kali ini pink booow...and i hate pink!! cuman gara2 kado dari tmen gw ajah, jadi gw pake)

kali ini lebih parah,,,jadi disaat SMA itu gw tertarik untuk buat puisi, karena gw malu untuk mem-publis-nya jadinya gw simpen ajah di diary gw..

jyaaaaaaaaaaahh!!! ketauan lah sama emak gw!!! dibacain ajahh lhohhh di depan keluarga besar!!!!

kapok lah gw!!!!

sampe akhirnya sekarang gw mencoba untuk membuat blog..

yang sepertinya akan memuat kebodohan gw,,kemarahan gw,,keluh kesah gw,,

yang dimana emak gw tercinta ga bisa nemuin dan baca dan akhirnya menyebarluaskan curhatan kampung gw~

ghaghgahgahgahgahaghaghaghagaaa....eat that maa~!haghaghghghaa

jadi saya mau meminta maaf sebelumnya bagi orang2 yang membaca blog saya,,

karena dari blog ini tidak bisa diambil manfaat dan kaidahnya~

hgahgahgahgahgahgahgahaghghghaghaaaaaaa..

dan maaf bagi orang2 yg membaca,,,tulisan saya agak "bodoh" karena saya bukan penulis yang berbakat,,

hghahhaahahgahgahgahgahgahgahgaaaaa.. :D